I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
and she was petting her beer can
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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