Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
