after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
