Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
