i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
