Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
