I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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