so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
