I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
porn star boner night. come get it.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life