I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
