Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
