The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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