I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
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