Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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