Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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