i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Randomize
