So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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