billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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