You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Everclear isn't food dammit
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
