we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
