Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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