I molested 6 butterflies tonight
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
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