Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I would ride that face into the sunset
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
