whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
