DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
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He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
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I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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