Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
