He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
be right there i have to get my cape
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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