You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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