wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
only you would photoshop your dick
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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