Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
