I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize
