Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize