i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
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I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
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Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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