Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
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I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
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I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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