have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
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you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
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Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.