I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
