hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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