I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
