The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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