So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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