trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize