I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize