Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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