you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
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Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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