I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize