on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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