question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
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