so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Randomize
