ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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