We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
